When it comes to housework, I’ve been fired multiple times by a beloved, supportive, shall we say “particular” spouse. During the 19 years we’ve been married, he’s discovered that I am not particularly talented at many of the “core skills” he expected of me when we said our vows under the chuppah at what used to be Town & Campus in West Orange. One such skill is laundry. It’s one of the few jobs I actually don’t mind doing, but the concept of separating whites from colors is just too much work. Clothes are clothes and I think they should co-exist peacefully. Hubby, and apparently science, …
Girls and science just don't mix. At least that's the message that comes from report after report including one on the underrepresentation of women in science and math from the American Association of University Women. The study, released last year, found that even though women have made some strides in these fields, stereotypes and cultural biases still stymie their success. What's needed? In the end, the study stressed the need for more parental involvement and female role models. For sure, parents can help drive their daughters' interests in science by infusing home life with science …
I can’t pay my kid to read Anne of Green Gables. The Little Princess, Little Women, Little House on the Prairie? Forget it, out of the question, no way. But why? As I learned when I gave a talk at the local public library, for more than 100 years, dead-ending with my daughter, you could assume that a girl raised in the United States had read or knew about Little Women. In a room of more than 50 women gathered at the library, all of them could name the four main characters in the novel. Canadian girls had the equivalent in Anne of Green Gables. For British girls, the Enid Blyton and E. Nesbit …
Each season brings a new set of forms for camp, school, sports, and scouts. And on each piece of paper, along with name, age and t-shirt size, I provide my kids’ emergency contacts. As I write those familiar names and phone numbers that I have memorized, I realize how the years have brought me choices. When I first moved to New Jersey, I listed names of people in New York and far away in this state. When I knew my neighbors better, they joined the roster. Now friends, and neighbors who have become friends, are on that list. Still, when I step back, I realize what it means to choose a friend …
Sometimes a vacation is not a vacation but more of a mind-bending family trip. Last week, my husband, kids and I flew out to Colorado. We'd used frequent flier miles to book our flights, and made reservations at a hotel that had been recommended by two friends who were great skiers and had stayed at the hotel before. We hadn't skied as a family in several years but figured it would all come rushing back to us. We set our clocks ahead, rose early and arrived the day Daylight Savings Time kicked in. That was mistake number one. The two-hour time difference, plus Daylight Savings, messed with …
In my dream I am chatting in a shop or restaurant. Another customer turns me, saying, “That was the pluperfect subjunctive used flawlessly, in a contrary-to-fact conditional clause, no less. Muy bien.” Yes, my goal is to speak perfect Spanish, and I labor through a grammar book on Sunday evenings. Last night, I learned to say, “I would prefer that you remove your dirty cat before the other people arrive.” At the same time, I wonder what I could or should—and that’s the subjective right there, mis amigos—be doing to further the language skills of kids I know. I was relieved when Nicholas …
Friday night I poured myself a glass of wine and told my kids I was going upstairs to take a bath. It had been a long week and I wanted time to relax and get ready before I went to hear Alan Paul read from his excellent new book Big in China: My Unlikely Adventures Raising a Family, Playing the Blues and Becoming a Star in Bejing at a bookstore in Maplewood. My kids headed outside to play basketball and on their way out, my older son turned to me and said, "I feel like whenever I see you, you're drinking wine." "No, I'm not," I said. I felt ridiculous, because whenever you deny something like…
I have had that call, when a parent picks up the phone to tell me what shouldn’t have happened at my house. And my friend Evelyn received that call this week. As you know, if you live in the middle or high school realm, Glee’s new season began recently. As you may also know, the show includes singing, dancing, and suggestive banter and situations. Evelyn has three kids, and her youngest, Claudia, had a guest over. She and the guests did what eighth grade girls do: they giggled about boys, made brownies and ate the mix before it was baked, and pretended to study science. Fine, thought Evelyn, …
A few nights ago my older son stood in the kitchen and read me this quote from the March issue of National Geographic."How big is 7 billion?" he asked. I shrugged. "In years it's half the universe's age," he said. "In text messages, it's the US total every 30 hours." That means Americans text each other 7 billion times in a little over a day. Wow. But the truly shocking thing wasn't just the number. It's that my older son stood and read a magazine out loud to me—and didn't shout at me from his room to come look at something on his laptop that he had downloaded from the Internet. When I was …
Recently a former classmate from the elementary school I attended before my father was transferred overseas asked if I’d like to be on the alumni list. She’s a lovely person, so I felt bad saying no although that’s exactly what I did. I explained I have such horrible memories of the school I’d never like to be reminded of it and certainly would never donate money to it. I have reconnected with the friends from the school I’d like to reconnect with through Facebook. I knew from an early age children could be breathtakingly cruel, especially girls. I was a half Iranian little girl in Texas …
Real estate agent Sidney Simon said she'd planned to enjoy a romantic evening at a nice restaurant with her husband over the weekend to celebrate Valentine's Day. She said she even lucked out when she discovered her daughter's school was offering a "parent's night out" evening of activities for students. "However, when I told the kids, they rejected the idea of spending the evening in a school gym and they wanted to go to dinner with us," she said. "So I decided that we'd make it a family Valentine's dinner and—to make it even sweeter for 'them'—I picked up tickets to the premiere of the …
I chose not to change out of the jeans that I had worn for four days in a row because I figured no one would brave the cold and icy Monday night for a book discussion at the library. It wouldn’t matter what I wore. Before I left, I tweeted the guest of honor who would be joining the group from her home in California by phone, and I let her know that I’d be covering the event for Patch. “I’ll see you there,” tweeted celebrated author Ayelet Waldman (@ayeletw). Where else but Twitter could I reach out directly to the famous or infamous as the case may be? It was Ayelet Waldman who admitted to …
