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Health & Fitness

Exhibit A

Conspiracy theories of municipal government.

Let us now praise Montclair's parking enforcement attendants, who do their jobs with ruthless efficiency, and marvel at the stark contrast between them, and the Byzantine workings of our municipal government.

I had a morning's worth of errands to do downtown, so I parked on Forest Street, where there is free two-hour free parking. I returned after 90 minutes and moved my car. I did not move forward one car's length, but pulled into the street, past a few cars, and a driveway to re-park.

I'm fairly certain this is legal, but the parking enforcement attendant did not agree, and when I returned another 90 minutes later, I had the dreaded parking ticket tucked in my windshield.

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I called the Parking Authority to inquire as to the legality of my actions, and had to leave a message.

Since they will to take longer to return my call than I have to pay the ticket, and are certain to tell me I need to show up in court regardless, I called the Municipal Court to enter a plea of not-guilty, and was informed that I had to wait twenty-four hours before entering a plea. I asked to leave a message. It was a rhetorical question, but I couldn't resist.

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I called again the following morning and entered my plea, and now I have a court date in June. 

It's my word against the parking attendant's, and I've already spent more time on this than the trouble it's worth, but you can't blame a girl for trying.

Root for me.

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